Many years ago, I went through an intensive teacher training course in England. In order to get on it, you had to have taught full time for five years after obtaining your initial teaching certificate. I was thrilled to get accepted on the course, since it was at one of the top institutions in the U.K., and I knew it would end up being the resume equivalent of a feather in my cap.

I took the course, and it wasn’t until I was halfway through it and feeling more stress than I’d ever experienced in a learning environment, that the instructor let something drop that reframed the entire experience for me. He said “our intent is to entirely deconstruct your teaching so you can rebuild it here.”

Over the past couple of months, I’ve been going through a similar deconstruction process with regards to a professional goal I’d set myself—one also related to teaching. I won’t go into it in detail, but the penny finally dropped yesterday. My plan, that I’d designed, spent thousands of dollars on, and have spent thousands of hours carrying out…is just garbage. It’s unworkable because I’ve realized that the professional goal I’d set just isn’t attainable. The world of education I’d experienced as a student has completely disappeared, and it isn’t coming back. As it is impossible to participate in a world that is extinct, I’m left with the realization that there is no point in continuing to pursue my goal. The object of it doesn’t exist!

I feel a little bit like Don Quioxte, having tilted at windmills. One of my Celtic tarot cards shows a woman who has found that the entrance to a sacred place has been completely blocked. She has turned away from the place, but is standing on the road with her back to it. She is standing still, looking a bit lost and baffled. She knows that what she wanted just isn’t going to happen, but she doesn’t know where to go now. Whoops!

Sometimes it just goes like that, gentle readers. Sometimes we just have things fall apart. After the disappointment, anger or frustrated feelings pass, however, we can start to lighten up. “It seemed like a good idea at the time,” we can joke. Strangely enough, I know that my decision to abandon this plan altogether is a good one, because underneath it all, I feel a sense of relief.

So when you are faced with a similar situation, don’t be afraid to just let it all go. You do NOT have to finish everything you start, just because you started it. If you realize you’re onto a fool’s game, then stop playing it. It’s OK to give up what’s not working. And it’s also OK to sit in that stunned silence as the ground slips away from under your feet. Out of the chaos will come stillness, and out of the stillness will emerge a new order. (Out of that order, of course, chaos will come again, but you know the drill by now.)

If you are feeling some doubt about your plans, like a nagging feeling that just won’t go away no matter how hard your rational mind argues, then take a moment and imagine this: what if the King of the World told you that you could do anything else you wanted to, but that you were absolutely forbidden to continue working towards your present goal?  If you thought of this hypothetical situation and felt a glimmer of relief, joy, peace or happiness, then you really need to do some digging. What is your higher mind telling you about the situation as a whole? What about your heart? Who or what are you pursuing this goal for, and why? As Socrates said, “the unexamined life is not worth living.” Don’t be afraid to look deep within, and be willing to see the truth that is inside you.

Good luck!